A breakup can be painful. What can be more painful are the constant reminders of a love you once had. Some people have difficulty forgetting those who were a big part of their lives even if it ended badly. Yet, you need to move on to eventually meet someone new.
How do you get over the hurdle? There are 14 techniques you can use to forget that once special person and allow them to simply be someone that you used to know.
- Accept the situation. A breakup begins a grieving period, much like a death and there is a process for that from unbelief, to sadness, anger, then finally acceptance. Get to the acceptance part quickly. It is over.
- Let it go. This means you don’t let the breakup hold you back. Put down the spoon you’ve stabbed into the half-gallon of ice cream, get off the couch and do something productive.
- Leave the house. You do eventually need to go out. There are errands to run, work to do, and friends to see. Even just going out for a walk will help in accepting what happened. Fresh air will do you good.
- Leave the past alone. Many women start overanalyzing what happened in the relationship, whose fault it was, what they could have done differently. While it is okay to acknowledge your mistakes and use that knowledge in future relationships, constantly replaying everything in your head doesn’t allow for you to move forward. Just stop.
- Take care of yourself. This could be treating yourself well with a mani/pedi or setting a plan to better yourself over the long-term such as going back to college. It could mean working out, eating better, reading more, or taking up a hobby. Really, do anything that improves yourself and your life. You will build confidence and look awesome should you ever run into your ex, which is great revenge.
- Avoid things that make you remember. There are going to be things, like a song or a restaurant, that remind you of him. Stay away from them.
- Create a new lifestyle. Up until this point, your life has been involved and in some cases revolved around this other person. It’s time to create a new routine and lifestyle that doesn’t. Do things they would never do. Meet new people. Try a new bar, club, or restaurant. It will open up new opportunities and draw your attention away from your ex.
- Don’t communicate with your ex. Don’t look on their social media. Don’t text them. Don’t call them. Don’t accept calls from them. This is one of the hardest things to do because, many times, there are regrets on both sides and one will seek the other out. Don’t do it. Remind yourself it is over.
- Block and delete. Take them off your social media and your phone. This will prevent you from relapsing into communicating with them. They don’t need to know your business, so block them from your media accounts. Likewise, you don’t need to know theirs.
- Don’t actively try to stop thinking about them. Actively trying to not think about a person will only make you think about them more. Instead, distract yourself with other activities.
- Journal. Writing your feelings down offers a release like none other. You need to express yourself and this is a therapeutic way to do it.
- Create a plan. Having a plan for the future is a great way to adjust without someone in your life. A plan gives you a sense of control. Setting goals gives you something to look forward to.
- Travel. This may seem weird since you are alone but you can’t let singleness stop you from seeing and experiencing new things. Go on a girls’ trip or take a trip with other singles. There are plenty of options.
- Let time heal. I know it sounds trite, but time is a great healer. You do learn to live quite well on your own and eventually, there will be someone else.
Being able to move on after a breakup can be difficult, especially if it was a long-term relationship. Even so, you have the strength to do it. You just don’t know it yet.
