Quite a number of couples usually ask me about this thing “chances” when they visit my office. How many chances should you get and give at the same time? How long should you suffer in a relationship? We should forgive our partners how many times? And many more. You may be surprised at just how many chances you need if you give it a thought. It’s all about the haul in a long-term relationship. Yet, quite a number of couples pay attention to little issues and catalyze them into bigger issues than what they actually were. What if we just gave each other another opportunity to make things right?
What is a deal breaker for you?
Do you love your partner so much to even give them another chance to make things right after making a mistake? There are disagreements in a relationship due to over perceived wrongs. Once we see that our partner has done something we wrong, we immediately perceive that they must be wrong about something else too. In any case, your partner misjudged or told a lie would that be like a deal breaker to you? No, it shouldn’t.
Learn to forgive since mistakes help you grow
You’re both in this journey to become who you are meant to be. You grow and evolve differently and at different times. We all mistakes since we’re all human. What you should do is not let those mistakes control you. But rather you should try and learn from those mistakes and give each an opportunity to be human without being judged. Know that you are both imperfect. These relationships should strengthen your relationship and make you grow as couples. Have you given it a thought of how different things will be if you use those mistakes as opportunities to forgive and learn how to be better partners for each other rather than putting blames or judging yourselves?
Give yourselves many opportunities as much as you need to get things right
This is not easy. As other times you will have to deal with feelings, hurt and ego. There are consequences for our choices and mistakes. We should be ready for that. What we need to do is just go in for the long haul. Know that this is a lifetime journey and you’re here with one individual whom you can grow with therefore, you should give each other as many chances as possible. Give your partners the opportunity to grow and correct themselves. You’ll be amazed at who you’ll both become.
